If you’re still looking for someone to blame for Donald Trump’s 2024 reelection, don’t just look at the usual suspects — the MAGA die-hards, the QAnon crowd or your uncle screaming at Fox News. Consider the bros at your local gym’s squat rack, the Discord server or the gaming lounge who suddenly swung right— or, better yet, consider blaming the Democrats who decided those guys didn’t matter. Yeah, nice work, geniuses.

Recent focus groups conducted by the centrist Democratic group Third Way, with the polling firm HIT Strategies, show that many young men feel criticized, overlooked and talked down to by a party they see as hostile to their values and concerns. This echoes similar feedback from last fall, when young male voters told pollsters that the Democratic Party “has somehow become the anti-male party.”

If you’re wondering why this siege mentality hasn’t softened, it may be because the condescension and antagonism persist — especially among progressive elites whose statements are often conflated with the Democratic Party.

July alone offered a plethora of examples. And lest you think this is from the fever swamps of the internet, consider a few selections from the New York Times.

First, we got “The Boy Crisis Is Overblown,” which shrugs off boys’ educational struggles, instead suggesting that boys expect others (women) to pick up the slack, both at home and in school. Then came “ The Trouble With Wanting Men,” a literary masterclass on how dating men amounts to unpaid emotional labor. And to round it out, “Why Women Are Weary of ‘Mankeeping,’” which blames men for … being human? Having different priorities than their girlfriends and wives?

See a pattern?

None of these pieces are entirely wrong. Boys and men are only human, and there are good guys and bad guys. But if you’re a dude just trying to stay afloat in a rapidly changing world, you might get the impression that the cultural left, which (let’s be honest) constitutes the Democratic Party’s base of energy and pressure, isn’t exactly rolling out the welcome mat.

And if you’re a guy, what do you do with all of that criticism? You check out. You find a podcast. You listen to some YouTuber explain how protein cured his depression and why you should never trust a woman who owns more than one NPR tote bag.

You exercise your greatest act of middle-finger rebellion: You vote for Trump!

Now, you might say, “Is it really fair to blame the entire Democratic Party for what a few writers say?” No! But politics isn’t about fairness. It’s about vibes, and the vibe right now is that progressive culture has morphed into the HR department from hell. Heck, even Sydney Sweeney in an American Eagle ad was too much for the online pitchfork crowd. What’s next? Canceling golden retrievers?

The problem for the Democratic Party is that once you’re branded a “woke scold,” it’s hard to pivot, no matter what you say.

Look at President Joe Biden. He was called “Genocide Joe” for supporting Israel, yet still got blamed for pro-Palestinian campus protests— proof that stereotypes are sticky, and perception, not policy, drives voter sentiment.

But here’s the irony: Democrats have an opportunity to turn things around — and if their friends weren’t so busy writing gender theory op-eds, they might notice there’s an opening to do just that.

Thanks to issues ranging from tariffs to immigration roundups to the Jeffrey Epstein scandal, some of these podcast bros have started mocking Trump. Meanwhile, “South Park” skewered him for threatening lawsuits to intimidate or silence his critics, which is an impressive about-face considering he used to score points by criticizing cancel culture.

“While some of these young men are still drawn to Trump and the Republican Party,” Third Way’s focus groups found, “most are persuadable swing voters who dislike significant aspects of Trump’s actions so far in his second term.”

But it’s gonna take more than President Obama podcasting about “ what’s right with young men.” It’s gonna take modern leaders — men and women — who have the guts to stand up to their own tribe and say, “Hey, maybe we shouldn’t treat half the population like defective appliances.”

Want their votes? Talk to them like they’re human. Stop acting like masculinity is a war crime. Nominate a presidential candidate who lifts and can go on Joe Rogan’s podcast. Offer some real policies that don’t sound like they were cooked up in a gender studies seminar at Bryn Mawr.

Until then? Don’t be shocked if a whole generation of guys hears one more lecture about toxic masculinity … and decides to vote for the most toxic guy in the room.

This is how Trump wins.

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Matt K. Lewis is the author of “ Filthy Rich Politicians” and “ Too Dumb to Fail.”

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